I wrote letters to both Randy and Chuck and never got responses.
I was reassigned to Kelly AFB and did not return to DaNang.
About 3 years later I ran into Randy. The first thing I asked him was; "Is Chuck OK?"... "Yes he was"...
The ground attack didn't come my last day there, but it was an ongoing concern and the FAC's were moved to Thailand within a couple of weeks after I left. They stopped flying at that point. They made it home shortly after that.
I have always been bothered by leaving my roommates and Jimmy behind. Seeing Randy certainly helped but it still feels like I left them behind and broke a bond. I know the feeling they must have had after I left...
Jimmy on the other hand... I have a lot of mixed emotions. I wanted so bad to find him and bring him home and yet it was out of my reach. But he was MIA and he was alive in my mind. It helps that I now know his unit did a 3 day search for him and that more information was brought forward just recently. Jimmy is no longer MIA. I will try to no longer imagine in my mind that he is still held captive. I know his family was well taken care of and his mother got some closure before she passed away.
I wrote this blog story for my daughters so that they may know what it was like for me to live a little tiny slice of history. I want them to know what war is like so they can draw their own conclusions... I want them to learn. The answers are not always clear.
My roommates and I always joked about "what can they do to us... send us to the front lines in a Cessna"... as we acted on the edge of being out of control. Yes, our job was dangerous, but the mission was good, we were there to save American and Vietnamese lives... and we did. We experienced the adrenalin high of all out war to save the troops on the ground and the feeling of being a "Free Bird"... even when we were being shot at. We also lived through the experience of being a "Sitting Duck". Still, we knew what was worse...
We could have been down there on the ground, slogging trough the mud, jungle and rice patties. We could have been sleeping in a foxhole or a tent. We could have been pinned down by gunfire from an unbelievable number of enemy soldiers... while waiting for air support. We could have felt and heard the impact of artillery landing nearby. We could have been crawling through enemy tunnels in the dark. And much, much more...
As FAC's we never saw our good friends die... they just went out alone to fly and didn't come back...
We went back to our hooch every night. To our ice cold room and refrigerator full of Bud. We had Crystal Gayle singing help me make it through the night... every night. HA... We could occasionally find a box of Ritz Crackers or Vanilla Wafers to buy.
DaNang was a place the ground soldiers could come to and have relative peace. DaNang was a great place to them.
I salute those soldiers on the ground... and I pray for them... they are my brothers...
I have written about my experience in detail and with emotion. I have lived it again as I have written. It is very clear in my mind... like it is happening as I write. I have also gotten answers to many questions as I have researched. What I have learned has all been good. I am grateful for the answers. But I am through now. I am going to tuck it away in the back corner of my mind... and be quiet... all is well... but I want to put it to rest.
Thank you.
